Being a teenager (or almost teenager) isn’t exactly easy, and hormonal changes make it hard to get along with your parents most of the time. So it’s important to try hard to stay calm, and as non-confrontational as possible around them.

Remember Your Place

You have a unique place in your family, whether you’re an only child or the middle child, you’re one of a kind. It’s very important that you remember where you belong in your family lineup at all times. It’s also important to remember what your parents expect of you. They’re going through changes, just as you are, so try to take care of the little details, like chores, and you’ll encounter less conflict.

Take a Deep Breath

You’re going to have fights with your parents and your siblings, the idea is to minimize them. First of all it’s important to take deep breaths. Try to think before you speak and count to ten if you can. Taking one deep, cleansing breath will help center you and focus your thoughts.

Choose Your Battles

You’ll likely want to snap at every little thing your parents say some days, it comes with the territory (and is completely normal!). But it’s up to you which fights you actually engage in. Try to save your energy, and battles, for when it really counts. Also try to think through your parents’ side. It’s not easy to do, but you’ll soon realize that your parents don’t mean you any harm and they really do, usually, know what’s best.

When you feel your blood starting to boil and the anger or frustration building up, take that deep breath and decide if it’s worth the effort. Arguing with your parents will only stir them up and could possibly get you in trouble. Is whatever it is, worth losing privileges over?

Fight Fair

The problem with most fights is that the parties involved don’t fight fair. If you can remember not to scream and yell and if you can refrain from name-calling you’ll find a much better outcome. Try not to interrupt and try to really listen to your parents’ side.

Make Family Time Important

Your parents will be much more supportive of you in the long run if you make an effort to make them important to your life. If your family doesn’t already have a Family Movie Night or a Family Game Night, help start one. Spending time with the family is the best way to make them realize how much you really do love them.

Also keep in mind how important it is to make time for your family on other random occasions. When family events pop up, or your parents ask for you to join them for a dinner, give them some quality time with you. That way when you ask to hang with your friends they won’t feel like they never see you.

Also when you do things with your family make sure you really participate. Don’t just sit there and pout or be difficult. Just because you’re a teenager doesn’t mean your parents are suddenly lame, they’re still the same parents you’ve always had.

Follow the Rules

The best way to keep your parents on your side and happy with you, is to obey their rules. You may not like them and you may not understand them, but your parents have reasons for the rules they set in place. The better you listen to them the more likely they will be to let you do things you want. And let’s not forget that the fastest way to punishment is by breaking a rule.